Adam-Jackson

This month will be pretty crazy. Many of you know that I took a break from Twitter where I didn’t tweet for over two weeks and I’ve come back slightly more tame about my tweets only doing 2-4 a day. This new style enabled a lot for me but closed many other opportunities. Now that we’re entering the month of March, I have been doing this new way of sharing for over 2 months and the benefits have been pretty grand. Yesterday, I shared news about my new job at Brightkite that I’ll be starting on Monday. There are many many more good things happening this month. Many are public and others will remain private under my new sharing model.

Before I talk about my move, I first wanted to address something that has bothered me since I decided to move to a new place about 3 weeks ago. This guilt I’ve put on myself is pretty severe and one that kept me from moving a while ago and that’s the feeling that I’m giving up a piece of myself simply by changing my geographical location. See, when AdamsBlock was happening, I made it clear that I wasn’t broadcasting because I hated where I lived (San Francisco’s Tenderloin District), and instead wanted to share with friends and family what was keeping me awake at night. I never knew it would blossom into a real company or that my idea would be used to place me as an ignorant racist who though the homeless were scum and had to be eradicated (not my words). In fact, I loved living in the Tenderloin and write this from my apartment in the heart of San Francisco’s historical district.

Many times, I’ve written about the ‘loin but this entry is one I’m most proud of because it explains exactly why I live here. In that post, I wrote:

I don’t live in the Tenderloin for cheap rent anymore. Trust me, my $1600 a month studio apartment isn’t cheap. The reason I live in the Tenderloin is because I want to constantly be reminded of the human struggle which we all are going through. Living somewhere that’s “quiet and safe” is completely the same except they have fancier drugs and more elaborate crimes. By living where I do, I pass a homeless shelter, free food lines and many more “outreach services”. The constant reminder that I, at any time, can lose my job and be on the streets or an unfortunate sickness or illness could land me in the same food lines and the constant reminder that I have absolutely nothing to feel “down” about because I have a roof over my head keeps me living life to the fullest.

Without a constant reminder that we are so damn lucky to have what we have, we will cease to live and seize the moment at every moment of our day. This is why I live in The Tenderloin. It’s not to gentrify the neighborhood or laugh at the homeless or experience cheap rent. It’s to feel alive when I walk to work every day and know that everything can change so fast and that I’m so lucky to be alive.

Yes, my work with AdamsBlock earned me an award from the city of SF, but I don’t think I deserve any award as there are hundreds of public servants who are unpaid that go out every day to make the community a better place and I’m just a guy who put up a webcam to highlight exactly what was going on without the filter that our media presents.

I feel like moving out of the ‘loin is my way of giving up, retreating to the suburbs and abandoning the people who I’ve grown to love and respect over the past 2 years. The reminder of what my fellow human beings are going through is going to not be a daily punch to the face but instead a blur as I ride the bus by the neighborhood I used to live in.

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Why am I moving? Well, I’m not moving out of the city because I love San Francisco. It’s an incredible experience to live in such a diverse city. My reasons for moving are the following:

• Space. I simply can’t find a large apartment in the Tenderloin without paying a ton of money. I want more space where I can be in my apartment for more than 4 hours without feeling like I have to get out of this place due to its size.
• Convenience. I don’t work in San Francisco anymore so living downtown (a 10 minute walk from my job at Yoono) isn’t necessary. I can’t walk to Burlingame and since I have to get on a train anyway, might as well move to the ‘burbs.
• Nature. There aren’t any trees downtown unless you count the Christmas Tree that is erected in Union Square each year. I miss trees, parks and the sound of kids playing. It’s comforting. I wanted to live somewhere with trees.
• Cost. Saving money is huge as well. If I could save money and have more space, that would rock!
• The personal touch. I wanted to rent from a landlord who was available, involved and friendly. Living in an apartment building doesn’t feel very personal.

With that said, I once again, got extremely lucky as I did with the job at Brightkite (applied to 3 places and found a job in 36 hours). On a Friday afternoon from 4-5PM I browsed Craigslist for apartments in my price range (below $1500) and chose 10 neighborhoods I’d love to live in

• Potrero Hill
• Castro
• Hayes Valley
• Cole Valley
• North Beach
• SOMA
• Eureka Valley
• Twin Peaks
• West Portal
• etc.

I’m sure you can get the idea now that I’ve listed a few. I emailed 6 places that interested me and on Sunday, I visited the top 3 places. It was after the first apartment that I stopped in on that I was immediately in love with. My friend Justin liked the place too but I think he was a bit surprised that I immediately left saying, “I want that place.” so, after viewing two other apartments (one on 19th ave. and another in West Portal), I emailed the couple of the first place and faxed in my renter’s application.

The new apartment is amazing. Upstairs, a married couple with a child lives as they own the home. The baby’s room is on the other side of the home and the couple works quite a bit and they’re rarely home. Downstairs is the in-law suite which is what I occupy. It’s roughly 500 square feet, quiet and spacious.

The neighborhood is Twin Peaks and as you can see from these photos I took atop twin peaks last year, I’m super stoked to be living there. (Click the photos for a better view)

Actually, I’m living on the west side of Twin Peaks so I get a nice view of West Portal, The Avenues and Ocean Beach. Sure, there’s the occasional fog but I’m just stoked to be close to nature and a 5 minute walk from the underground SFMTA Metro Rail which will take me to Caltrain so I can get to my new job.

Back to my “list”: I now have space, the place is $1200 a month so I have $400 more in my pocket each month, the location is among and surrounded by trees and down the hill from me is an elementary school with public park so I get to hear and see families spending the day at the park and kids playing but it’s far enough that with the door closed I won’t hear a thing.

The huge selling point of my new apartment is a very large deck. The deck is 20×20 feet (yes it’s huge) and the owners don’t use it at all. I walk out of a sliding glass door onto this gorgeous deck. Now, it’s been neglected so there are leaves and dirt but I’ve talked to the homeowner and he’s agreed to pay the expenses of paint, a pressure washer and cleaning supplies and I’m going to spend next weekend getting the deck up to my standards. The place where my desk will be going is right by a large sliding glass door looking out on to the deck and surrounded by trees. I’m in heaven.

Back to the owners, they’re a super friendly and very educated couple in their 30s. I’ve never had a more pleasant experience securing an apartment. Last time I came over, the husband and I discussed his home networking and he pointed out that there were Cat5e terminations already in the in-law suite so I could just plug in. Yes, he said “Cat5e” so I know we’ll get along just fine. When I suggested he up the Comcast connection from 15mbps to 30/50, he agreed and was just going to pass the cost on to me. I’ll be putting my Airport Extreme + Time Capsule into his garage where he has everything wired up to a patch panel & switch.

So a technie, friendly couple is renting to me and they support my “handyman” approach to renting and they have been a real pleasure to work with on every front.

I move into my new apartment on Sunday night and start my job at Brightkite on Monday. For the past few weeks, I’ve been hinting to Twitter that March is going to be amazingly insane as far as scheduling goes and I wasn’t lying.

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I was lucky that one of my best friends and first San Franciscan that I ever became friends with back in 2005/2006 is moving across country next week. That’s not why I’m lucky cause I’ll miss hanging out with him from time to time. The lucky part is that he sold me pretty much all of his furniture (couch, end-tables, coffee table, appliances, computer desk, chairs, lazy-boy, 40″ tV, blu-ray player, bose speakers, coffee maker and more) for just under $1400. I’ve been living in furnished apartments for the past 2 years and it’s nice to have my own furniture finally.

The only thing left to move is stuff in my apartment over the weekend like computers, clothes, a bicycle and food. I live a very minimal lifestyle so everything fits in 6 boxes. My life philosophy is to only own things that you use at least once a week so I never go overboard and only buy what I need.

I did splurge and bough an in-home bar for my new place. My rejuvenated love for cooking and diet means i cook every meal at home and that kind of morphed into another passion of mine which is alcohol. No I’m not a big drinker but I’ve always had a liquor cabinet in my apartment and now it’s no different. I’ve ventured into making cocktails and have over 30 bottles of liquor in my apartment w/ all of the tools required to make a great cocktail. The new bar in my apartment will finally display my collection and give me space to make drinks for friends that come visit.

With the extra space, friends can sip martinis or wine while I cook for them as I have been doing for months now but now they can sit at my dining room table and we can eat dinner while watching a real television on a couch (things that I haven’t had since moving to SF two years ago). I feel like for the first time ever, I’m finally in a place I can call home and my friends have made it an even richer experience.

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I’m going to miss being able to call The Tenderloin my stomping grounds. The people, restaurants, public transit and weather. I’ll never ever get over the fact that I didn’t eat my own dog food and retreated to the suburbs but if the Tenderloin could provide more space and a few more parks, I’d happily still be living there.

Thanks to my new landlords and their ridiculously cute kid for being so hospitable. Thanks to my friends for helping me find a place and moving boxes over and thanks to everyone who has lent me a hand over the past couple of years. I remember fondly the tips I got from SF locals, the job opportunities I was given from companies and the support of my family who have always been there for me. I can finally have friends & family visit me and stay at my place and I can finally host dinner parties and finally come home and relax knowing that this is mine and my place of relaxation and when things get bad, I’ll step out onto my deck, drink some tea and watch the fog cover this beautiful city. I’m so stoked about the new place and my new location.

Thanks for reading.

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Here’s a slide show of my new neighborhood

I’ve worked in many industries with some exceptional people. Since the age of 13, it’s been work work work in nearly every aspect of my life. I built houses with my Dad, worked in a lumber yard and even got a commercial drivers license and trucked building supplies all over Florida all before I was 19. At Apple, I worked with a talented group as an assistant manager of a retail store and it was an awesome job. Following Apple, I worked for an IT Consulting Group and was on-call 24/7 as 2nd in command of a team of technicians. While I was hopping around, I consistently pushed my online brand, blogged, learned and explored the web and how it connects us in so many ways. I came to San Francisco in June of 2008 to take my love and passion for online communications to the next level and it’s been a wild ride.

The first 3 months in San Francisco were spent networking, learning, exploring and getting my feet wet in many things. I was convinced that I didn’t need a full time job and I’d just do small projects that I was passionate about. Then, I fell in love with a product called Yoono and applied for a job. On September 10th, 2008 I was hired as their Community Evangelist and began spreading the word, doing QA, tech support and cultivating the growing community of users. I’ve never had more fun working on a single product. I had side projects for after hours but I worked nights and weekends for Yoono and it was simply an awesome experience for the past 1.5 years.

I hadn’t planned on leaving Yoono, nor did I fully expect to find a new job so quickly but in the first week of February I logged on to LinkedIN.com and searched “evangelist” within San Francisco in the “Technology” industry. I found three fantastic companies that I highly respect. One was an iPhone games company, another was a traditional media company and the 3rd was Brightkite. I sent sincere and unique cover letters that weren’t your typical introductions to each of the three companies. The next day I received 3 interview requests and 7 days later I decided to take the position at Brightkite.

This process took just under 9 days but that’s how things are when you don’t “need” the job but you really want it. A couple of weeks ago, I accepted a position at Brightkite as their Community Manager and put in my two weeks at Yoono.

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On Monday, I begin my new job in Burlingame at Brightkite. Last night, I had drinks with the team and spent a few hours bonding and taking a tour of their office. It’s an exceptional group of people.

Why Brightkite? Well, the same question could apply to Apple, Gwanda and even Yoono. A long time ago, I realized that if I am not fanatical about a product and its potential, I won’t work on it. This has meant that I have missed some great and high paying opportunities but that’s how I’d rather work. Brightkite is something I used religiously all of 2008 and early 2009. Their iPhone app has an excellent UI and I’ve been using their Droid application for the past day and it’s also very easy to use. Their service is location based which is something I’m very passionate about but what sets them apart from the other groups is the ability to post photos of where you are and they offer very finely tuned controls for how your location is shared with the world. As usual, there are aspects of their service that needs to be improved but I’d be saying the same thing if I’d chosen to work with Gowalla or FourSquare.

As many of you know, I deleted my FourSquare account last month. I did so because the game took over the social aspect of simply sharing your location. We forgot why we checked in and it became a competition for items, mayorships and “rent” or virtual currency (MyTown for iPhone). Brightkite is in a perfect position to take location to the next level and this excites me.

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Regarding Yoono, I’m going to remain a beta tester for them as a user simply because they are working on some incredible products and I want the nightly builds. Regarding my other small projects, I’ll save that for another post. There have been some changes lately but the gist of it is that I’m devoting all of my time, resources and mindshare to Brightkite for the foreseeable future and am extremely lucky to be a part of the team responsible for igniting the location based social networking space and the team who is going to take it to the next level.

Thanks for reading and for all of your support!

PS – Add me on Brightkite! http://brightkite.com/people/adamjackson

As many of you know, I said my goodbye to Macworld Expo last year and I meant it. I didn’t speak a peep about it not because I thought Macworld was dead but simply because my focus had shifted and IDG didn’t do a great job convincing me to come back (not that they should have, i mean c’mon I’m just a dude with a blog). Anyway, my friend Victor who is an editor at TUAW (The Unofficial Apple Weblog) sent me a DM via Twitter before the show and asked if I could stop by their booth to say hi and do a quick video cast about my thoughts on this year’s show.

I picked up my free expo badge acquired almost a year ago after the 2009 show and spent 15 minutes cruising the show floor as fast as I could and talking to a few of my long time friends to see what their thoughts were regarding this year’s Macworld Expo. Then, at around 2PM PST I hopped on the stream with Victor and he whispered to me, “a few thousand people are watching.” Oh boy!

The video came out great aside from the obvious fact that I was severely nervous now that thousands were watching so my normally calm voice turned into a frightened teenager and I started talking very very fast. Either way, you can make out most of what I said.

Original Post (Via Tuaw.com) Video Below:

One more thing. I remember that the last time TUAW linked to my site was in 2007 when I was running DailyTechTalk. (link).

I started taking photographs a few years ago but it wasn’t until around May that I started going out weekly to snap photos. Now, I venture out every other day and sometimes there are photos that I deem good enough to post.

Last week, I bought Apple’s Aperture 3 software and started experimenting with processing of my images. The results are okay. I am pasting a few of my favorites below.

My photos are still just okay. The processing is something new and I’ll try to get better at it over time. All of these had some processing of some kind. As you can see some of it was minimal and other times it was pretty drastic. If you know of any online resources for improving my photo editing let me know.

I was chuckling to myself while doing my pre-writing preparation because as I jotted down the key points to illustrate in this post I realized just how stupid it is to write about the complexities and simple aspects of life on this blog using fancy big words and the tools you’d need to read it (computer, iPhone, web connection). The whole thing is just ludicrous but that’s what I wanted to talk about.

When the world is ending, everything that you fill most of your time with will cease to matter. The job you sit in traffic to get to, the bed that you financed and sleep on every night and even the time you spend thinking about sex or keeping yourself groomed. All of these things take time but when your life is ending, there’s only one thing that will be on your mind – survival.

Too often lately, I see our human nature to over complicate things and make things far more difficult or complex than they need to be. Luckily, the logical part of our brains helped us invent some amazing things. Technically, the human race is pretty remarkable and it enabled all of us many opportunities to live long prosperous lives despite the fact that humans are pretty weak when it comes to our natural survival skills.

Today, I was amazed that an event that happened in my life nearly 14 months ago was still being talked about on a small but active Internet message board. The events of December, 2008, also known as “AdamsBlock” is something I long ago abandoned for more modest opportunities that didn’t call for putting my life at risk. I hope the project is a success but it will be without my direct involvement and I’m okay with that. The small group continues to talk about their “work” toward forcing me out of my San Francisco apartment and into hiding and every month I see referral links from the message board as the same people reminisce about this one thing that they did as a group. Today’s thread was no different and you can check it out here.

I’m going to use this message board as an example for a post I’ve been thinking of writing for a while. Keep in mind, this is just an example and not a direct attack on the members of the community or their beliefs.

Let’s put a few things in perspective. Tom is sitting behind his computer, a fan of artistic self expression (graffiti) and loves talking about it and sharing his opinions with a like minded community. He types away on a Sony laptop from a coffee shop in lower Manhattan. Each day, Tom signs onto a message board powered on a co-located web server and types in text that are his opinions and other people read them. This community of a few thousand people sit and talk every day about art, politics, news and “lulz” (funny stuff). He puts quite a bit of time into this talking about others, sharing his ideas and generally “shooting the shit.” What is the value that Tom puts on this forum? What is actually occurring that is so grand or life altering about the time he spends on this message board? What is he actually accomplishing?

The same can be said about most entertainment such as video games, sex, sports and television. Taking things one step further and it can be the case for dating, our jobs, our homes and our possessions. We build up complexities to distract us from the important things such as survival.

Yes, money is survival and a social life is also integral to our survival just as much as having a shelter is important. When it all comes down to the last moments of our life, all of that doesn’t matter and fades away. I guess a logical person would compare it to hunger or having to pee – when you gotta go, most other thoughts just fade away and your priority is finding a bathroom ASAP. The past few days I did a movie marathon; Armageddon, Deep Impact, 2012, 28 Days Later, The Hangover (cause it’s hilarious), Outbreak, Independence Day and so on. The recurring trend wasn’t the human race coming together but it was the fact that money, possessions and the bullshit that we spend so much time thinking about ceased to exist and it became a movie about survival.

What can we learn from this?

Well, I think the guys on that message board are doing a fine job expressing themselves in their community just like I do every week on this blog. We shouldn’t change how we live but I think an emphasis on the fragile lives we lead is important. Remembering that on your way to work, your life can end. Planning too far out into the future is careless and a waste of time because the short term and the now should be your #1 priority. I’m not saying go to vegas and put all of your money down and I’m not saying forgo a retirement fund. I’m just saying that planning too far out is a mistake. A minor example of this was when Laura and I were dating. I bought her a plane ticket to Vegas for Blogworld. Well, she and I broke up and I lost $200. yeah it was only $200 but things change and you have to understand that if she and I lost our lives because we accidentally stepped out into traffic, those two airline seats would be empty where we would have been. Ever think about that? when there’s an empty seat next to you on the plane and you tweet, “sweet leg room!” do you ever think that the person that bought that ticket may have died on the way to the airport?

See. Things are a lot more fragile than you think. An earthquake can strike San Francisco and level the entire city as I write this last sentence and I’d most likely die and these words would live on in a Microsoft Word Document on my laptop. I could die in my sleep tonight and this was the last thing I ever wrote or The Earth could collide with any one of millions of asteroids out in space and we’d all be dead. This can happen at any time so while you plan your summer vacation, pay your mortgage or type “EPIC FAIL” on the Internet message board, remember that your life could end at any time and you gotta keep that in perspective.

Today, Scott Beale of LaughingSquid linked to an Esquire interview conducted by Chris Jones. The interview was truly remarkable but the real focus on Roger Ebert and how he beat cancer but lost his lower jaw in the process. That isn’t really important for the sake of the interview or the content contained in it as told by Ebert himself. What stands out time and time again is that I’ve read two columns by Ebert about his “condition” and each time I’m simply fascinated by how he has lived his life after  cancer. Well, let me rephrase – I’m fascinated with how Ebert views life after cancer and how he writes so eloquently about so many things that touch me personally.

The first column by Roger Ebert that I ever read was linked to by John Gruber of DaringFireball and it was titled, “Nil by Mouth“. In that post, Ebert discusses the beauty of food and how food relates to socializing and how, without a lower jaw, Ebert misses those delicate moments of very specific foods. In the piece, this section stood out to me the most:

Let me return to the original question: Isn’t it sad to be unable eat or drink? Not as sad as you might imagine. I save an enormous amount of time. I have control of my weight. Everything agrees with me. And so on.

What I miss is the society. Lunch and dinner are the two occasions when we most easily meet with friends and family. They’re the first way we experience places far from home. Where we sit to regard the passing parade. How we learn indirectly of other cultures. When we feel good together. Meals are when we get a lot of our talking done — probably most of our recreational talking. That’s what I miss. Because I can’t speak that’s's another turn of the blade. I can sit at a table and vicariously enjoy the conversation, which is why I enjoy pals like my friend McHugh so much, because he rarely notices if anyone else isn’t speaking. But to attend a “business dinner” is a species of torture. I’m no good at business anyway, but at least if I’m being bad at it at Joe’s Stone Crab there are consolations.

When we drive around town I never look at a trendy new restaurant and wish I could eat there. I peer into little storefront places, diners, ethnic places, and then I feel envy. After a movie we’ll drive past a formica restaurant with only two tables occupied, and I’ll wish I could be at one of them, having ordered something familiar and and reading a book. I never felt alone in a situation like that. I was a soloist.

How much we take for granted a cheeseburger or soda and how much we rush through these things. This post actually inspired my recent fasting because I wanted to come back after 5 days and taste a burger like it was my first time and I will always remember so vividly sitting in In-N-Out on a rainy Monday all alone staring at the burger after not eating for 5 days and thinking to myself, “this is going to fucking rock” and boy did it!Each bite of the hamburger was truly remarkable and the diet sprite tingled my tongue and my throat. The cheese ground into my teeth and the crisp lettuce massaged my gums. Trust me, it was pretty awesome.

The interview with Ebert in Esquare Magazine was exceptional but I’m once again drawn to Ebert’s recent column in the SunTimes that he wrote in response to the interview. I picked a few parts that I really loved.

This was a conversation he was having with his wife, “Chaz”.

“Did you really have to write all those Tweets about Rush Limbaugh?” she asked me one day. “He’s a sick man. What if people had written about you that way when you were in the hospital?”

“That would be their right,” I said heroically. “Besides, he said he was fine.”

“And you wouldn’t care what they said about you?”

“Resentment is allowing someone to live rent-free in a room in your head,” I intoned. That line isn’t original with me. It may have originated with her.

This speaks loudly about many of the reasons that I’ve pulled back from being online so much. I call it “micro-celebrity” because that’s what it is only because I’ve been called that a few times. I consider it being famous for not really doing anything. I don’t think I’ve done enough to have 3,000+ Twitter Followers or 30K people reading this blog every month but I do and that comes with some responsibility and yes, some stalkers. Celebrities have it rough and without a support system, it’s easy to let things get to you. Ebert’s wife posed an excellent question, one that Laura said to me very often when I criticized others after just expressing my distaste and displeasure of being called “fat” by some anonymous commenter on my blog. Of course, I’m not as wise as Ebert nor as comfortable in my own skin to have such a terrific quote in response to the situation. I’d like to post it again:

“Resentment is allowing someone to live rent-free in a room in your head,”

Wow. This is coming from a man who has been a professional critic for many many years and has sat on both sides of the table as the critic and the person being criticized. What wisdom inherited in this quote that truly excites me about one day being able to say this out loud and truly believe it and live it.

Later in the article:

Well, we’re all dying in increments. I don’t mind people knowing what I look like, but I don’t want them thinking I’m dying. To be fair, Chris Jones never said I was. If he took a certain elegiac tone, you know what? I might have, too. And if he structured his elements into a story arc, that’s just good writing. He wasn’t precisely an eyewitness the second night after Chaz had gone off to bed and I was streaming Radio Caroline and writing late into the night. But that’s what I did. It may be, the more interviews you’ve done, the more you appreciate a good one. I knew exactly what he started with, and I could see where he ended, and he can be proud of the piece.

I mentioned that it was sort of a relief to have that full-page photo of my face. Yes, I winced. What I hated most was that my hair was so neatly combed. Running it that big was good journalism. It made you want to read the article.

It is uncomfortable to stare into the eyes of Roger Ebert after seeing his face for so many years in the newspaper. I have a bit of regret, more emotions of sympathy kick in but it wasn’t until I read the article and how he lives without the joy of food, normal conversation or appearing “normal” at least cosmetically that I actually feel inspired to live life differently with a new outlook and not one of normality where I take everything for granted. Ebert has lived his life, sure but the condition he’s in now only inspires sympathy for 10 seconds and then I’m ready to live my own life knowing I could grow old and have people who are sympathetic to my “condition” whatever that may be. His philosophy and view on how things went continues to amaze me. This part truly stood out.

I studiously avoid looking at myself in a mirror. It would not be productive. If we think we have physical imperfections, obsessing about them is only destructive. Low self-esteem involves imagining the worst that other people can think about you. That means they’re living upstairs in the rent-free room.

Too many of us focus on our looks and not trying to better ourselves from the inside out. Living a long and healthy life is absolutely essential as I’ve learned that I was recently in the later stages of developing diabetes at only 23 years old. However, focusing on our faults only leads to less action because you’re too busy thinking about it. Roger is saying that sitting in your house imagining that you’re at the store buying milk isn’t actually helping so don’t focus on the milk, hop in the car and drive.

The final sentence about low self-esteem speaks volumes to me as well. I have always had high self-esteem until I threw myself into an industry of overachievers, successful hard working people who worked very hard for what they have. All of my great friends are in their 3os and it’s difficult fitting in sometimes as they have money and know what they love and don’t like. After a few failed projects last year and rising criticism from anonymous commenters, things took a turn for the worse and I allowed a few thousand people to live rent free in my head instead of focusing on buying the milk, I sat at home and simply convinced myself that the milk I was going to buy had already gone bad. This is how I spent my last 6 months and I achieved very little.

Ebert’s words speak volumes to so many humans today and I know for a fact that he’ll be remembered by his philosophy and strong spirit more than how many thumbs down he gave to the movie, “Cable Guy”. I hope to relive the emotions i have right now while writing this blog post. I feel inspired to live and will continue cultivating that feeling for a long time coming.

Thank you for reading.

A few weeks ago, I posted a blog entry about what’s going on. Well, today I opened up WordPress to post what’s really going on, what’s really happening and what’s really on my mind.

After writing and jotting down the specific things I wanted to cover and writing a few paragraphs, I hit the delete key. I used to never do that but since I stopped sharing it all on Twitter, Facebook and right here (beginning around mid-December), I’ve had over a dozen friends all in their 40s tell me, “I’m glad you changed what you say online. Try to keep some stuff offline and only among friends.”

So, despite that fact I want to tell you about my health, my job, my life, my little projects, my relationships with friends and my dating life. There are so many things I want to share with you guys not because any of you give a crap but because it’s my own sort of therapy and way I make many of my decisions which is to simply talk things out.

Lately, I haven’t done that. Has my life improved? Yes. Have there been things I wish I had worked out and gotten online feedback from first? Yes. I’m still in this transition of sharing or not sharing things online. It feels absolutely bizarre to not put things online, check in at locations and share my financial and health data via iPhone TwitPics. It’s still a period of growth for me and a period of trying new things. I’m not sure how it will end but the path has lead me to some new things and all at a perfect time.

Man, I wish I could say some of these things that are going on but those of you who know me, also know how to reach me and how to message me and you all have and it means a lot. Thanks for reading.

In late November, I met Justin Leung. We became friends. In mid-December, Justin told me about this program called Climbing for Kids (CFK) which is organized by Bay Area Wilderness Training (BAWT) as a program that raises money for kids in the bay area to explore the wilderness in a safe and controlled way.

BAWT’s Mission:

BAWT exists as a vital, comprehensive and ongoing source of support to agencies that lead youth wilderness trips. We believe that urban youth, once exposed to wilderness, have a broadened sense of themselves, each other, and the world around them. BAWT extends it services to the eight counties of the San Francisco Bay Area. We hope other organizations will take this vision to the rest of the country and the larger world.

BAWT’s primary strategy for achieving its mission is to provide Bay Area youth agency staff with wilderness leadership training and outdoor equipment so that they, along with the youth they serve, may explore the power and beauty of California’s wilderness.

As a non profit and community betterment agency, they raise money through donations but there had to be a better way to help fund this terrific operation in a new and exciting way. A few years ago, the BAWT team organized something called “Climbing for Kids” which aims to help fund the wilderness training.

From their website:

Climbing for Kids is a fundraising event that supports Bay Area Wilderness Training (BAWT), a non-profit organization that gets at-risk and underprivileged youth outdoors. For every $1,000 you raise, an average of 17 kids will get outside on trips with experienced adults using the best gear in the outdoor industry. In other words, by joining Climbing for Kids you’ll be effecting the lives of over 50 kids.

Bay Area Wilderness Training (BAWT) is a project of the Earth Island Institute a 501(c)(3) corporation founded by environmental activist and climber David Brower. Brower’s legacy as a climber with hundreds of first ascents on High Sierra peaks is only overshadowed by his legacy as a tireless champion of the environment. Read more about BAWT, Brower, and Earth Island Institute.

Justin and I signed up for CFK in the middle of December and began taking part in practice hikes and training to climb Mount Shasta in June. Since CFK is a way to raise money for the year round efforts of BAWT, each climber has to raise money, $4500 to be exact.

• Each climber is given the following:
• A choice if four different mountains to climb
• Six months of training by the way of bi-weekly practice climbs & team building
• Coaching and advice from people who have done the program before
• $1,500 in FREE climbing gear needed to scale the mountain
• Each climbing group gets a tour guide
• The incredible pleasure of funding a terrific organization that helps kids across the bay area

Where does the $4,500 go?

Every dollar of the money donated will go to the organization (BAWT). This money is used to work with outreach services in the bay area to train mentors who will, in turn, lead groups of kids on hikes or full on weekend camping trips. Most of the kids that enter in these have never been camping before or spent more than a few hours in the woods. The video below explains how Climbing For Kids benefits bay area kids.

This video goes a tiny bit further in explaining how BAWT helps get kids outdoors:

This is a training climb of bay area park, Mount Diablo (one of the many training hikes we go on leading up to the big climb)

This is a short video made for the June 2009 climbing of Mount Shasta:

To join the program, I put down $500 in my own money and pledged to raise the entire $4,500 by May. I’m legally bound to the full amount by that date. Yes, that’s a bit scary but I have complete confidence in my friends and family to help me recoup those costs and their support will help me climb the mountain and achieve an altitude very few people have ever reached without being in an airplane.

My training has not been easy. I started on December 1st and can now do 10+ mile hikes without any fatigue. I’ve also dropped 35 pounds with 30 to go and I’ve only been training for 60 days. I have 90 days to raise the $4,500 and then all that’s left is the climb and it’s not going to be easy.

About the Climb:

Mount Shasta (Úytaahkoo in Karuk or “White Mountain”) is located in Siskiyou County and at 14,179 feet (4,322 m)^[1] is the second highest peak in the Cascades and the fifth highest in California. Mount Shasta has an estimated volume of 85 cubic miles (350 km³) which makes it the most voluminous stratovolcano in the Cascade Volcanic Arc.^[5][6]

I’ll be climbing the mountain with my friend Justin Leung and we’ve been training hard to make this a reality. It takes place over 5 days and the last 3K feet of the climb is the most challenging due to the limited oxygen in the air.

Donate:

I can’t do this without your help & support. Our big donors will be receiving support in the form of thank yous on our blog and businesses will get ad placement on the blog and special t-shirts that we’re making for the training hikes and climb in June.

You can help me by donating here: http://bit.ly/donate-adam

It’s completely tax-deductible and will be going to a great cause!

Follow our Progress:

Justin and I are blogging about our training & practice climbs on a blog that we setup specifically for the climb. Follow along here: http://adamandjustinclimbshasta.com

Tonight, one of my close friends was let go from what many would call, “a teenager’s dream job.” He was an intern for the popular and widely respected technology blog, TechCrunch. My friend’s name was Daniel Brusilovsky. A lot of people in business use “friend” lightly in conversation but it usually involves a scale of good, great and close being added before the word friend as a way to one-up the other guy that you know said “friend” better than they do. It’s a pet peeve so of mine but for the sake of this post, Daniel was a very close friend of mine for many years.

Daniel was a friend. In fact, I wrote about him only 48 hours ago. Here’s what I said:

3. Daniel Brusilovsky – Daniel was barely 14 when he and I started chatting over email in 2007 or maybe it was 2008. I honestly can’t remember. He interviewed me for The Apple Universe Podcast and did a great job quizzing me about Apple and Macworld. We chatted on and offline for a while about tech and otherwise. When I moved to San Francisco, Daniel was always there to introduce me to his business contacts and I can rely on him to put me in touch with some of he harder to reach people via email or phone introductions. Daniel is more than a lubricant for my self-promotion. He’s also a guy who’s listened to my gripes and criticisms and even taken the initiative to take me out to lunch after we hadn’t caught up in a while. Daniel has helped me feel less alone as he went through and is going through many of the things that I am. It’s a big industry and making waves isn’t easy. Daniel gets that and is always there to lend a helping hand. I had dinner at his house with his Mom and Dad. Both of Daniel’s parents are wonderful people. They’re kind, respectful and honest and Daniel is lucky to have a tremendous support system in his parents. Daniel has been a true friend.

Tonight, Michael Arrington, Founder and Editor-in-Chief of TechCrunch posted this announcement: (the gist)

On Monday evening I received a phone call from someone I trust who told me that one of our interns had asked for compensation in exchange for a blog post. Specifically, this intern had allegedly asked for a Macbook Air in exchange for a post about a startup.

After an investigation we determined that the allegation was true. In fact, on at least one other occasion this intern was almost certainly given a computer in exchange for a post.

The intern in question has admitted to some of the allegations, and has denied others. We suspended this person while we were sorting through exactly what happened. When it became clear yesterday that there was no question that this person had requested, and in one case taken, compensation for a post, the intern was terminated.

It didn’t take long for the web to figure out who it was. I knew immediately. Speculation began and soon, the blog post will surpass 300 comments (possibly 500 by morning) and 500 mentions on Twitter. Everyone has an opinion. Most of the comments are applauding TechCrunch’s integrity of posting this. Other comments are targeting Daniel and placing him in a few categories of what kind of person he is to push their own agenda (teen, kid, victim of the public school system, web 2.0 celebrity).

The only thing blatantly apparent through all of this is that everyone loves a good scandal or maybe it’s controversy but whatever, people are soaking this up. For the sake of wrapping up the story before I move on to my own opinion, Daniel posted a statement to his blog:

In some way or another, a line was crossed that should have never been. At this time, I do not want to go into details, but I will publicly say that I am truly sorry to my family, friends, TechCrunch, and especially the tech community. Since 2006 when I first got into the internet, I have felt comfortable, and working at TechCrunch has made this experience even better. TechCrunch is not to blame for any of this — TechCrunch has given me the opportunity of a life time. I can never say thank you enough for TechCrunch for the amazing last nine months I’ve had.

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Now that everyone is caught up on what happened and I’ve been extremely clear about my past relationship with Daniel, this incident has brought up a subject that I touched on before but never revisited and my past 3 months have made this statement even more important.

Live by your means, act your age, take care of your body, expand your mind and learn to respect and love those who are far better off and far worse off than you are.

At the end of June I wrote, “A Letter for The Kids” In that post, this excerpt applies to my point:

The path of life is interesting as well. Everyone is on a different path but, as my Father taught as a young age, every movement is a ripple in the water that affects everyone. As a human, it’s natural to be self-absorbed and self-serving and don’t worry, we all do it but I’ve tried to be mindful of others while still being successful and what I’ve learned about success is that it’s the most challenging aspect I’ve experienced in life. Moving across country was easy, finding the most amazing woman was easy and making enough money to get by is always easy but sucess is more than work, it’s the responsbility that comes with it.

When you become successful, you give up a piece of yourself. Everyone loves hearing a success story and as I succeed in more projects, I’ve had to bring on a new responsiblity of recognition which means more people following your every word. I’m not a celebrity and I’m glad because every opinion, thought post and move is criticized by a few dozen people. It grows every week. Also, making money can be easy but when you make money, the more tempted you are to take bigger risks for higher returns and I’m very guilty of making money and losing it on a bigger and better project. I need to step more carefully on this.

As you grow older, breathe more, learn more and explore more. Never stop exploring. I was speaking to a friend that works for himself, he’s 25 years old and travels a lot. He’s not wildly succesful but he makes enough money to spend half of his year traveling. It’s interesting to hear of his travels but also of his advice. He’s told me countless times that travel and exploring doesn’t shape you any way because of where you go. Going anywhere but where your home is can affect you enough to realize home, family, friends and stability is what makes life so amazing. A month in Ireland can be a fun experience but returning home is more rewarding than the trip itself. Remember that as you grow older and want to move out of the house, do something spontaneous and have zero responsibilities. It sounds interesting and fun but it can be tiring and actually age you before your time. Wisdom is one thing but age is another.

And this line:

The only way you can rise above the hardships and pain is to remember where you came from and always be sure of where you’re going but never, ever stand still because when you do, that’s the moment life stops and just as a still pond grows algae, our spirits will grow sour every moment that you sit still.

It’s easy for me to force Daniel and other kids in his situation to read and apply what I’ve written but the reality is that this was written by me AFTER experiencing and making mistakes. It’s easy for us old fogies to preach, teach and lecture those young kids but it’s experiences that shape our lives and this experience will shape Daniel’s for many years to come.

I don’t wish failure or embarrassment on anyone but, without a few missteps, we won’t be able to truly realize how lucky we are to be alive, employed, loved or respected.

Daniel was put into a position of power time and time again at a very young age and I still believe he deserved every bit of success because he went out and took it and he worked his ass off to get where he is. He didn’t work his ass off to one day get a free computer. What drove Daniel is the same thing that drives all of us no matter what industry, school, project or goal we have. Daniel was driven and the sky was the limit.

————————————-

The first thing I’d like to say is regarding the comments and commentary. Your love of scandal and joining in the mob got the best of you. If you can safely say you’ve never done anything immoral or illegal in your life, then feel free to criticize the hell out of this. Using the excuse, “well he’s on TechCrunch and should be held to a higher standard than I am” is no excuse.

Let He Who is Without Sin Cast the First Stone

Simply keep your mouth shut unless you’re willing to admit something that you did wrong as well. We have all done stupid and irresponsible things both as adults and children. It’s safe to say that this was the first of many “stupid mistakes” in Daniel’s life not because he is a bad person but because he’s a person and each of us makes mistakes.

Someone earlier told me they had lost all respect for Daniel after hearing this news. Trust me, there are many more people that you’ll respect at some point in your life that have done or will do far worse things than what Daniel did. I can guarantee someone you look up to will do something horrendous and you may never find out.

Before you can criticize someone else, look inward and make sure your conscious is clean.

————————————-

I’m going to go out on a limb here and most likely piss off my friends, Daniel and his parents by saying this incident is far from the absolute worse thing that could have happened to Daniel. This is petty. On the list of “bad things” a person can do, this is nothing. He’s an intern under the age of 18 that took a bribe to write a blog post for a company that he most likely already favored just based on the founders, the product or some other reason.

However, despite the fact that this was a petty incident, I’m happy this happened as I’m sure many more people are. I’m not happy because I want Daniel to fail. I’m happy because I want Daniel to succeed and I breathe a sigh of relief that it was only a “bribed blog post” and not something far worse. However, the incident is big enough to alter how Daniel lives his life from now on but not so bad that we won’t see him for 10 years as he’s stuck in a jail cell.

I saw where Daniel’s life was taking him. I saw his future and it wasn’t bright. Sure, he’d be running a company in 10 years, entertaining buy-out offers from Google and driving our his Tesla roadster with an up & coming LA Actress under his arms walking down red carpets but would he be living his life to the fullest potential? Would Daniel be living? I doubt it.

To some people, success is living but I know from being in this bubble for only 2 years that there’s a bigger world out there and one that Daniel has never experienced. Daniel was born in Silicon Valley. He grew up with a dad who worked for a tech company. He lives a bike ride away from some of the most successful tech companies in the world and he worked, interned and visited companies that are shaping the world and inventing cool products. It’s safe to say that he needed to live his life outside of this bubble even for a few short years before he truly began to value what he had.

I hope Daniel takes this opportunity to step away from the tech world for a while and here are a few things that I hope for him. The reason why I’m listing these things is because these are things I NEVER DID as a kid (aside from the girlfriend thing). The things I’m about to list are things I never tried or did but things i wish I had done now that I’m nearly 24.

• Find a best friend or two (one that isn’t in tech at all)
• Find a girlfriend / boyfriend and fall in love or at least learn the ins and outs of a relationship
• Read books about things you don’t care for or know nothing about. Expand and challenge your mind.
• Put down the laptop / iPhone and take a month to 6 months without technology
• Go on a vision quest or simply go camping for 15 days all alone out in the woods. Find your proverbial spirit animal.
• Try alcohol (once)
• Try cigarettes (once)
• Join a club (academic or not)
• Join a gym and focus on being in the best shape you can while your metabolism is high and your testosterone is peaked
• Go on a road trip with 2 best friends with no destination and a tank full of gas
• Go on a vacation for no reason to somewhere you wouldn’t normally go.
• Go to college and enjoy every fucking minute of it
• Admit something to someone you love that you’ve never told anyone before
• Set a physical goal and do it! (faster mile, heavy benchpress, most pushups)
• Sell every piece of technology that isn’t absolutely essential and use the money for a trip to somewhere exotic
• Backpack through Europe
• Work on a farm and learn to love it
• Build something (physical not software)
• Hold a job outside of tech and learn to love it
• Work in manual labor or fast-food. Trust me, you’ll learn to appreciate how hard these jobs really are

Ya know, this list was a hell of a lot longer than I wanted it to be but honestly this was a list of things that I wanted to do before I turned 25. I’ve had alcohol and I’ve fallen in love with a girlfriend and I did work at Arby’s for a few months when I was 16. Other than that, I have yet to do any of these things and that’s pretty sad.

I realize that Daniel is 6.5 years younger than I am. He could do all of this in the next year and then have 5.5 more years to get back into technology and have fun. He can do all of this before he turns 20 and still be further ahead than most kids his age both professionally and in life.

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What happened to my friend sucked but this will be a great thing for him and open up even more opportunities. I hope more kids that follow him and read my blog take my advice and take a break from trying to change the world until they’re at least 18 years old. I have a shit-load of 14-16 year olds that email me with dreams of moving to San Francisco and starting a company. It’s depressing because I have saved emails from where I wrote letters with the exact same words to people in their 20s when I was only 16 and no one told me to chill out and be a kid and there are a ton of things now that I regret and wish I had done instead of working so much.

I’m proud of Daniel and what he’s accomplished. He’s proven that he has the skills, work ethic and commitment to truly achieve great things even with so many factors are against him. Daniel, we all know you have it in you. Now it’s time to take a break, have some fun and grow your mind and you’ll come back to the tech world smarter, stronger and more mature. You’ll apply what you learned on hiatus with the already exceptional skills and characteristics and you’ll be successful, that’s a guarantee.

Other teens should do the same. You are all smart and exceptional people but you need to take your time and act your age. so I leave you with the statement I posted at the start of this blog post:

Live by your means, act your age, take care of your body, expand your mind and learn to respect and love those who are far better off and far worse off than you are.

I’ve been holed up for a few months now. Well, maybe that’s an exaggeration. I’ve been distant. Yeah, that’s better. I’ve been distant and kind of living, learning, loving and realizing so many things about myself. Every night, as the sun goes down, I sit in my apartment and open all of the windows. I look out to the west as the sun sets and I sip green tea and clear my head. It’s my favorite part of the day. After that, I go to the gym or grab my camera and go out shooting.

Today, I sat there for a couple of hours and counted the people who I’ve shared mutual respect and love for in the past couple of years living in San Francisco. I can count them all on two hands but each of these people has influenced my stay here in SF and I’m thankful that these individuals have been in my life.

1. Dom Sagolla – I think Dom sits atop the list (behind one other person I’ll save for last). Dom and I met while waiting in line for the iPhone 3G, merely 35 days after I moved to San Francisco. Dom, founder of iPhoneDevCamp, formerly of Adobe and author of “140 Characters” has been a terrific friend. He and I spent more time together than any other person I’ve met in SF. We spent overnighters and weekends working on micro-projects together. We coached each other. He introduced me to “life” outside of tech and enjoying the finer parts of the bay area and what it was like to follow your dreams and yet still have the courage, patience and maturity to raise a family and be a great dad. I introduced Dom to my friends, helped him the best I could on more than one occasion and introduced him to BT which helped him finish 140 Characters before the deadline. Dom wears many hats but has proven to me that you can do that and maintain your sanity. I’m still not sure how he accomplishes so much while not becoming “absorbed” in the task. It’s certainly something I hope to achieve as I grow older. Dom and I emailed back and forth tonight for the first time in a couple of months. It felt like old times. Dom certainly was my glue over the past 18 months. Well, maybe he was my duct tape. Either way, he was a true friend.

2. Nick Starr – Nick and I go way back. I met him in 2006 or maybe 2007 through a friend. I had heard of him through Internet circles and we had lunch one day and just connected virtually. He lived in Tampa and I lived in Jacksonville. It was nice knowing another tech fanatic who was only a few hours away. I followed his journey and his dreams of moving to San Francisco virtually via his blog and Twitter stream in 2007. Then, in 2008 I took the same journey and my first day in San Francisco was spent with Nick having brunch at Lime here in SF and then heading to Target to buy bath towels for the new apartment. He was my first friend in the big city. Honestly, I never felt that close to him though. He and I are both cautious on who we let in despite the fact that he and I share so much online. Lately, he and I have gone out more and done more things outside of Twitter and I’m realizing he’s a great guy and it’s a real connection. I’m glad to have him as a friend. We chat daily (mostly about technology) and see each other every few weeks. Just this week, I was leaving Safeway in Castro and Nick passes by walking into Safeway. We said hello and caught up. It’s nice and comforting to have that security in someone who knows where you came from and has been through what you’re going through in the big city. Nick is a true friend.

3. Daniel Brusilovsky – Daniel was barely 14 when he and I started chatting over email in 2007 or maybe it was 2008. I honestly can’t remember. He interviewed me for The Apple Universe Podcast and did a great job quizzing me about Apple and Macworld. We chatted on and offline for a while about tech and otherwise. When I moved to San Francisco, Daniel was always there to introduce me to his business contacts and I can rely on him to put me in touch with some of he harder to reach people via email or phone introductions. Daniel is more than a lubricant for my self-promotion. He’s also a guy who’s listened to my gripes and criticisms and even taken the initiative to take me out to lunch after we hadn’t caught up in a while. Daniel has helped me feel less alone as he went through and is going through many of the things that I am. It’s a big industry and making waves isn’t easy. Daniel gets that and is always there to lend a helping hand. I had dinner at his house with his Mom and Dad. Both of Daniel’s parents are wonderful people. They’re kind, respectful and honest and Daniel is lucky to have a tremendous support system in his parents. Daniel has been a true friend.

4. Abbi Vakil – You may not know much about Abbi. He may just be someone you’ve seen mention a few times on Twitter or in blog posts. Professionally, he’s a business man, investor and his “gut feeling / intuition” is what makes him such a valuable business man. I’ve given Abbi a sentence into what I’m thinking about doing and he immediately knows how to shape the idea into a successful product. His process is intimidating in the fact that I wish I had his skills of doing business. Abbi has sat down with me no less than a dozen times and listened attentively as I go on about ideas and thoughts and then he has offered quick, valuable feedback that shaped my next steps. I don’t always follow his advice but he’s been right about everything so far. Besides the advice, Abbi has been there as a friend. He has helped or at least offered to help on so many fronts that I simply can’t measure. Abbi taught me that friendship isn’t ROI (return on investment). He truly cares about people as I’ve seen him work the floor at Macworld Expo and parties and he’s not a “business man” by definition. He’s a human being who wants everyone around him to prosper and be successful. I’m extremely lucky to have a friend like Abbi to help me and support me. I hope that, one day, I can repay him for the hours and hours of time he’s given to me for free and how much he’s shaped my time in the bay area.

5. Justin Leung – I met Justin via Dom in late November. Justin and I are the “odd couple” when I think about our relationship as we enter into February. Justin will text me some days around 7:30PM, “what’s up?” I’ll respond, “oh nothing just eating dinner.” He’ll say, “cool well i’ll come over in an hour we’ll play some video games.” Our friendship has never been about business. It has but that’s secondary. Where everyone I listed above was business first, Justin and I met at a time where I wanted a friend, not a business contact and he and I “hang out” every other day. We’ll grab coffee around noon or he’ll come over and we’ll play some video games or we’ll sit side by side at the Marriot hotel sipping coffee at midnight working on projects and pausing to chat about something funny that we just found. Justin and I are climbing a mountain together. We’re getting healthy together. We’re living life and simply conjoining every so often so relate on a few things. He’s younger than me by 5 years but it’s been great. We’ve become great friends and Justin is someone I can rely on for most anything. Again, I hope I can repay him one day for the kindness he’s shown to me on all counts.

6.Scott Beale – Scott and I had more differences than similarities. Scott and I met at Macworld 2007 and we connected at my DailyTechTalk party at Swig. We’ve been exchanging mild banter back and forth since then via Flickr, Twitter and Email. Scott and I have mutual similarities like photography, art, music and a love for technology. I’ve recommended his amazing LaughingSquid hosting company and accompanying blog to friends and family time after time. I also have to remember, Scott’s friends are more than tech and they range across geographical lines, genres, cultures and age groups where most of my friends are limited to the bay area and the “web 2.0″ genre. Scott knows this but it doesn’t stop he and I from chatting it up at events or parties. In my first two months in San Francisco, I would go to the tech parties and simply “find Scott”. We’d chat for 15 to 30 minutes and I’d learn so much about the SF culture but also about the tech and art culture beyond San Francisco. It was enlightening and eye opening. The alternative benefit / effect to hanging with Scott was his friends would come up to say hi and he’d always introduce me. These introductions helped me meet more people and become more comfortable in San Francisco. I owe Scott so much for introducing me to the culture, the people and making me feel at home. Scott and his wife Lori will be moving to New York City soon but I’ll always remember the value and friendship Scott has shown to me in the past 3 years. He’s someone I hope to never lose touch with.

7. Laura Wiggins – Realistically, Laura has been my #1 for nearly 4 years. She and I met shortly after valentines day in 2006. I’m still captivated by our story of how we met and how these two kids fell in love and took on the world. It’s a wonderful adventure we took on.

Before I continue, I’d like to lay one thing out. You, the reader, were 23 once. You made mistakes. I’m making mistakes every day. I know this because I look back at the mistakes I made at 13, 18 and 21 and think to myself, “what an idiot I was!” Well, you are looking at me and thinking the same thing. That’s okay. Listen, I kept the details of mine and Laura’s break up very private. Assumptions were off the wall and ultimately I was blamed for a lot of things that aren’t true. I’ve made some mistakes in life but breaking up with Laura wasn’t a mistake. The past 6 months have enabled so much growth for me and I’m sure for Laura as well. I have no regrets about the decisions she and I made. Please allow me to move on. It was 6 months ago.

Anyway, Laura is my best friend (was and is). I’ve never relied on anyone in my adult life more than her. She even taught me how to love, how to hug and how to appreciate the little things. She took a workaholic with big ambitions and a small brain and said, “slow the fuck down and hold my hand.” For that, I’m forever grateful to her. Beyond our relationship and into the post-relationship period, our friendship has actually strengthened. I never imagined that I would leave a person the way we ended things and still exclaim that I’ve never had a more amazing friend.

Laura and I have now shared two chapters in our life together where many couples only share one. In the first chapter, we fell in love and were an amazing couple. I couldn’t have asked for a more amazing relationship with a person to share my 20s with. Looking back, it was incredible. She taught me how to love and showed me how much someone can love you back. In the second chapter, we have become best friends. I never had a best friend growing up as our family moved too much. The past few months, I have learned what a best friend is and I’m thankful to have had an amazing partner and now, an amazing friend. My preparation to move to San Francisco, the move and staying here would have never been possible without her support and I’m so thankful.

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On that last note, the same can be said for everyone I listed. My friends helped me truly fall in love with San Francisco and the value of such a vibrant and diverse city. You all made this journey possible and I hope to make it up to you for all of the support you’ve given me.

Of course, there were so many more people that helped me but these select few were most influential. The rest of you know who you are and I thank you.

Side-Note: There were a few women I wanted to mention in this blog post. Women that I began dating but soon realized I’m not really into dating anymore or I’m just not ready to date yet. I broke up with Laura in August but I just don’t feel like dating, going on dates or anything related to things you could do with a woman (wink wink). So, there are a few women in my life that have been wonderful friends. They’ve been supportive, caring and taught me so many great things about myself. However, like most relationships with the opposite sex, it takes time to figure out if you are BFFs or something more. I wanted to be careful and not list anyone here instead of someone else or list someone here who thinks we’re “more” or “less” than I portray. Like saying, “Susie has been a great friend” and Susie reads this thinking, “I thought we were more?” It’s just not a good idea. Sorry ladies.

Thank you all for reading. I know this is a long post. I just had to give thanks. I was lying in bed at 3AM and felt inspired to write this. It’s 4:30AM and I’m finally going to bed. Goodnight.